[Children voices:]
(If you're sleeping are you dreaming
If you're dreaming are you dreaming of me?
I can't believe you actually picked me.)
(”Hi Justin, this is your mother, and it's 2:33 on Monday afternoon.
I was just calling to see how you were doing.
You sounded really uptight last night.
It made me a little nervous,
And a l… and… well… it made me nervous,
It sounded like you were nervous, too.
I just wanted to make sure you were really OK,
And wanted to see
If you were checking in on your medication.
You know I love you, and…
Take care honey
I know you're under a lot of pressure.
See ya. Bye bye”)
I have to block out thoughts of you
So I don’t lose my head
They crawl in like a cockroach
Leaving babies in my bed
Dropping little reels of tape
To remind me that I’m alone
Playing movies in my head
That make a porno feel like home
There's a burning in my pride,
A nervous bleeding in my brain
An ounce of peace is all I want for you.
Will you never call again?
And will you never say that you loved me,
just to put it in my face?
And will you never try to reach me?
It is I that wanted space
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things
I didn’t do for you
Hate me in ways
Yeah, ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally
See what’s good for you
I’m sober now for three whole months
It’s one accomplishment that you helped me with
The one thing that always tore us apart
Is the one thing I won’t touch again
In my sick way I want to thank you
For holding my head up late at night
While I was busy waging wars on myself,
You were trying to stop the fight
You never doubted my warped opinions
On things like
suicidal hate
You made me compliment myself
When it was way too hard to take
So I’ll drive so fucking far away
That I never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart
To leave me behind
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things
I didn’t do for you
Hate me in ways
Yeah, ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally
See what’s good for you
And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave
Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made
And like a baby boy I never was a man
Until I saw your blue eyes cry
And I held your face in my hand
And then I fell down yelling, “Make it go away!
Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be»
And then she whispered, “How can you do this to me?”
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things
I didn’t do for you
Hate me in ways
Yeah, ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally
See what’s good for you
For you
For you
For you
[Children voices:]
If you're sleeping are you dreaming,
If you're dreaming are you dreaming of me?
I can't believe you actually picked me
[Mother:] Hey, Justin!