I'd rather go home
And watch porno all alone
I've got a big collection
A really huge selection
And if I'm really desperate
I'll call up my ex
And have sex on the phone
Porn is good for the soul
But that doesn't mean a thing invariable
Unless you own a good dildo
But then I bet you think I'm a whore
Sex is a drug
So throw me a bone
It's so innocent
That why I'm always phone home, phone home
Cuz I'm feeling ashamed
That I feel like a boy
Oh women are meant to act coy
That's why we've got all these toys
Porn is good for the soul
But that doesn't mean a thing invariable
Unless you own a good dildo
But then I bet you think I'm a whore