[Verse 1:]
I know why they call them labels,
Because you have to fit a label now to fit a label,
But If I'm a pussy, then I guess, I did my Kegels,
I got it on locks, I'll bring the bagels.
It kinda feels like middle school again when they call,
I think the majors can't decide if I'll come play ball,
If I can make them money,
If I can dumb my shit down enough
Or do the dance.
I think it's kinda funny,
They might be right, I'm shaped different like Toblerone.
I turned down a quarter mil to pitch a mobile phone,
‘Cause I believed that I can be more and walked away,
And left my hand up in the air like I just shot the J.
White rappers make it quicker if we talk like stars,
Hit the A-list, ‘cause you puffed on L's and dropped your R's.
Let's pull some video out of 5th grade pageant,
And compare the way you talked then to how you're rapping,
You think you sound the same?
Or that you picked up the way to be real in somewhere TV Land along the way?
If I just get fifteen minutes, I'm gonna stay myself,
And when that sixteenth minute comes, then I won't hate myself,
Maybe I'll never get signed, I'll fucking flatline!
But nobody gets to raise a banner during halftime,
Win or lose, I always choose myself and place a bid,
And make the same face on every play like Jason Kidd.
[Chorus:]
It's almost 4 AM,
Monday in my room again.
Got a crazy vision of a dream escaping from my pen,
I'll be swinging going down,
Fuck that noise, no way, no how!
You're listening to this song,
But I'm working on the next one now.
[Verse 2:]
If my goals are odd, I take as a challenge,
People seem confused by how I hope to use my talents.
Could he be Weird Al, could he be Jimmy Fallon?
I tell them to imagine Mos Def meets Woody Allen,
Haters give me balance, every Kyle's got a Cartman.
I know how failure tastes,
I drink it straight from the carton,
I always keep a gallon in the fridge at my apartment
To remind me how it feels to drop the ball like Stevie Bartman.
Believe me, I want to achieve it all by being me,
It's too easy to be cheesy on TV or DVD,
I'm seeking to sneak in, but I'm weeping when I peep the scene,
‘Cause I'm knee-deep in it and need a TP roll to keep it clean.
I'm digging for a deeper meaning ‘cause
Beneath this skin is a beating the temperamental heaving heart of gentle heathen.
If you deceive us, homie, that's so sad,
I'll get more aggro than the Aggro Crag,
I'm Boney Boney, leave me aloney, you know me well,
Don't dwell on that jabroni just ‘cause that baloney sells.
His flow is holey like the edge of abalone shells,
I want to flow holy like matrimony bells.