If you save yourself for marriage, you're a bore
If you don't save yourself for marriage, you're a ho-rrible person
If you won't have a drink then you're a prude
But they'll call you a drunk as soon as you down the first one
If you can't lose the weight then you're just fat
But if you lose too much then you're on crack
You're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't
So you might as well just do whatever you want, so
Make lots of noise, kiss lots of boys
Or kiss lots of girls if that's something you're into
When the straight and narrow gets a little too straight
Roll up a joint, or don't
Just follow your arrow wherever it points, yeah
Follow your arrow wherever it points
If you don't go to church, you'll go to hell
If you're the first one on the front row, you're self-righteous son of a-
Can't win for losing, you'll just disappoint 'em
Just 'cause you can't beat 'em, don't mean you should join 'em
So make lots of noise, kiss lots of boys
Or kiss lots of girls if that's something you're into
When the straight and narrow gets a little too straight
Roll up a joint, or don't
Just follow your arrow wherever it points, yeah
Follow your arrow wherever it points
Say what you think
Love who you love
'Cause you just get so many trips 'round the sun
Yeah, you only
Only live once
So make lots of noise, kiss lots of boys
Or kiss lots of girls if that's something you're into
When the straight and narrow gets a little too straight
Roll up a joint, I would
And follow your arrow wherever it points, yeah
Follow your arrow wherever it points