A used pink bathrobe
A rare mint snowglobe
A Smurf TV tray
I bought on eBay
My house is filled with this crap
Shows up in bubble wrap
Most every day
What I bought on eBay
Tell me why (I need another pet rock)
Tell me why (I got that Alf alarm clock)
Tell me why I bid on Shatner's old toupee
They had it on eBay
I'll buy your knick-knack
Just check my feedback
«A++!» they all say
They love me on eBay
Gonna to buy (a slightly damaged golf bag)
Gonna buy some Beanie Babies, new with tag
From some guy I've never met in Norway
Found him on eBay
I am the type who is liable to snipe you
With two seconds left to go, whoa
Got Paypal or Visa, whatever'll please ya
As long as I've got the dough
I'll buy your tchotchkes
Sell me your watch, please
I'll buy (I'll buy, I'll buy, I'll buy)
I'm highest bidder now
(Junk keeps arriving in the mail
(From that worldwide garage sale)
A Dukes Of Hazard ashtray
(Hey! A Dukes Of Hazard ashtray)
Oh yeah, I bought it on eBay
Wanna buy (a PacMan Fever lunchbox)
Wanna buy (a case of vintage tube socks
Wanna buy a Kleenex used by Dr. Dre
Found it on eBay)
Want to buy (that Farrah Fawcett poster
Pez dispensers and a toaster)
Don't know why, the kind of stuff you'd throw away
I'll buy on eBay
What I bought on eBay