[Drake]
Started middle class in a wheelchair
On a crappy sitcom making good cash every year
Now I'm dancing stupid by a car
Trying to convince you
that my life was so damn hard
I done had it tough from the jump
Livin' with my mamma in a nice house it was rough
On top of that shit
my bar mitzvah was wack
I didn't get a Bentley
and my cake tasted like crap
Then Degrassi canned me
cause I couldn't act
Had to get a real job
and I got promoted fast
So I decided «Imma be a rap star»
I met Baby and Wayne
and they loved me right away
They said
[Lil Wayne]
We like how you sound so monotone
[Birdman]
And those massive eyebrows are so marketable
[Lil Wayne]
We can tell your life's been a struggle
Do you even own a Bentley?
[Drake]
No, I dont, it's bullshit yo!
Can I sign with ya'll? Dat would be cool
[Birdman]
Sure you can big boy
Just meet us in the storage room
[Drake]
Took it in the bottom now I'm signed
Took it in the bottom from my new team
Now I'm signed
[Lil Wayne]
Now you can sip syrup 'til you're blind
By the way did you know I'm the best skater alive?
Young Moolah, baby! Tunechi!
[Drake]
I look like a pale caveman
Plus I'm a Canadian so I ain't no harder than Bieber
But I like to pretend that I am
Just don't tell nobody that I'm faker than Minaj's keester
[Random guy]
Why the hell are you wearing women's jeans?
[Weezy]
Hey get off of my case
They make me feel pretty
Tunechi!
[Drake]
Just to remind myself I'm a douche
I wear every single chain
even when I'm kissing Wayne, now we
Sippin' champagne on a private jet
Just to prove that I am richer
than you'll ever get
[Weezy]
Did I tell you guys that I skate yet?
[Drake and Birdman]
Yes!
[Drake]
Woah what the hell is that?
[Pilot]
The engines are under stress
Something is weighing this damn plane down
[Weezy]
The only explanation is Drake's big ass eyebrows
[Pilot]
I'm sorry but we have to throw you out
[Drake]
But I started from the bottom
[Pilot]
And that's where you're ending now
[Birdman]
We're leveling out ward
It was his eyebrows
[Wayne]
Yeeeaahhhh!
Weezy, baby, is gonna live!
Young Moolah baby! Yeah! Tunechi!
Young Money!